Benefits of time off
I recently went on a true vacation. Three mom friends and I went to Hawaii for eight days, without our partners or children. We stayed at my friend’s house in Kilauea on the northshore of Kauai. Our very generous host provided an Oprah-level experience: first class plane tickets, a convertible rental car, private yoga, two on-site massages, and a three day juice cleanse. There was even a mystical albatross on the property. We hosted a party for her local friends! The resort-like spacious home had a hot-tub, warm pool and private beach along with abundant fruit trees, breathtaking flowers perfuming the air and a view of cliffs, the Pacific and sunsets. It was an absolute dream vacation and the whole week was easy, magical and in flow.
One of our shared intentions was to recover from the pandemic and the extra physical, mental, emotional load we all bore since the world changed. I also had a personal desire to “change channels”. In my everyday life, I am quite subject to busy-ness and usually go to bed at night feeling the stress of running out of time, again, for everything additional I was hoping to accomplish that day. The transformation started at SFO when I felt like I was missing limbs, namely my children and the seven bags I usually pack, manage and carry. In Hawaii, I let the feminine tropical landscape do its work on my mind and body enough to let go and trust a new daily routine: wake up at sunrise to wild roosters crowing, meditate, enjoy ripe local papaya with lime, go for a walk and a dip in the ocean, read a novel, connect with my girlfriends and pick which hike to enjoy or beach to go to.
Benefits of Time Off
connection with nature
feeling embodied
easy communication
perspective
deeper relationships
physical, mental and emotional healing
detachment from the news and social media
freedom
art of receiving
deep sleep
letting go
gratitude
You might have guessed, it was a bit shocking to come home. Though I missed my children and saw my husband with refreshed eyes, I was instantly confronted by my invisible labor. There was an overly stuffed mailbox, dead flowers, an empty refrigerator and an upside down Welcome Home Mom sign on the floor that never made it up. There were logistics to be sorted for early the next morning, a kindergarten class party, a week of Camp Mommy, a wallpaper hanger, payment requests from babysitters and visitors coming to town. My toddler woke up 4 out of the next 7 nights insisting on sleeping with me (which I allowed him to do, but thankfully, his sleep has since returned to normal since). It didn’t matter, though, and none of it felt like a burden or a big deal. None of it got under my skin. Now, at night, when I feel the odd mixture of “shoulds” and mom-guilt for not parenting more gracefully or performing at work up to my own standards, I can picture myself laying in the grass in Kauai on my last night taking in the mind-blowing view of bright shooting stars across the Milky Way, and it all melts away. I can even laugh at myself. As one of my soul sisters said to me, “This isn’t a dress rehearsal, you get ONE LIFE!”